Big John: Sent: 05:46 PM 07/30/2009:
Heading back from the course now.

Big John:Sent: 05:52 PM 07/30/2009:
How close are you to a Jack in the Box? You mind doing me a favour?

Big John:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:
I will leave an envelope at the front desk under “Wendy”. That’s because I also want you to go to Wendy’s. Your room will be 305. Get settled and let me know when you are ready to see me. I will be i

Big John:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:
n room 201. You can come down the stair well next to your room. Make sure absolutely no one sees you. Make sure you don’t forget to Biggie Size my order.

Big John:Sent: 06:17 PM 07/30/2009:
Just so you know i have to get up at 415 tomorrow. To throw up. Jerk off. Eat the leftover pie. Then go back to sleep.

Big John:Sent: 07:30 PM 07/30/2009:
Just let me know when you are headed down. If you are, check to see if the buffet is still open.

Big John:Sent: 09:46 PM 07/30/2009:
What time is car picking you up tomorrow? Do you have time to go to drive thru?

Big John:Sent: 01:14 AM 07/31/2009:
Yes. Biggie Size it all.

Big John:Sent: 01:27 AM 07/31/2009:
Did you get lost. Door is open. I wedged the door open with a couple of empty Jack bottles.

Big John:Sent: 02:16 PM 07/31/2009:
What time do you leave. Im trying to leave. Im trying to get back. Back bacon, that is.

Big John:Sent: 03:57 PM 07/31/2009:
Will back in 5. Let me take a shit and have a few beers and i will text you after

Big John:Sent: 04:18 PM 07/31/2009:
Oh i know. Not at all. Just glad and suprised i can do that to you. Girls don’t usually let me suplex them. Im all clean. Except for my ass and the rest of the stuff below my neck. And my neck. And my face. Come on down:) Can you bring some paper towels? I ordered wings.

Big John:Sent: 04:22 PM 07/31/2009:
Hurry:) The early bird special at Sizzler stops at 5.

Big John:Sent: 05:08 PM 07/31/2009:
I’m glad you came out. I’m also glad I came on your tits then fell asleep.

Big John:Sent: 06:36 PM 07/31/2009:
Awesome baby. I don’t mind when you fart either. Be Safe. If you see my pants, let me know.

Big John:Sent: 03:13 AM 08/01/2009:
Thank you sexy. Found my pants. Forgot — cleaned up the wing sauce with them.

Big John:Sent: 06:34 AM 08/06/2009:
In ohio playing. Know any good bars here?

Big John:Sent: 05:54 AM 08/09/2009:
I told you im playing these two weeks

Big John:Sent: 06:50 PM 08/09/2009:
In about a month. That’s why it’s called the “Jelly of the Month”.

Big John:Sent: 06:51 PM 08/09/2009:
Maybe sooner. Depends on whether I can find a shitter. Can’t talk now. Will text when i can

Big John:Sent: 01:53 PM 08/13/2009:
Me too. I always Biggie Size it.

Big John:Sent: 10:27 AM 08/20/2009:
I hope not. So you have been with others huh since. I thought Hooters was our thing.

Big John:Sent: 10:35 AM 08/23/2009:
I hope so. You’d look real good in those tights.

Big John:Sent: 10:45 PM 08/23/2009:
Not a bad thing thinking about me.

Big John:Sent: 11:00 PM 08/23/2009:
I totally agree. It’s much better with cheese on it.

Big John:Sent: 11:03 PM 08/23/2009:
In conn. Hey, you can’t spell “Hartford” without the word “fart”

Big John:Sent: 11:07 PM 03/23/2009:
Ditto. I farted as well.

Big John:Sent: 11: 08 PM 08/23/2009:
I like when you do that to me. Those french fries tickle my chest.

Big John:Sent: 11:11 PM 08/23/2009:
Ditto sexy. That means I want two orders. And make them curly.

Big John:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/28/2009:
I want to be deep inside you.

Big John:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/28/2009:
Sorry, I was talking to my KFC bucket. Anyways, maybe in two weeks in chicago

Big John:Sent: 03:19 PM 08/29/2009:
I need that so bad.

Big John:Sent: 03;29 PM 08/29/2009:
Now:( Does anyone have a Zantac?

Big John:Sent: 03:30 PM 08/29/2009:
Me too. I would wear you out

Big John:Sent: 03:32 PM 08/29/2009:
Sorry. I have no idea why I was talking to a pair of Zubaz pants. I would love to have the ability to make you sore.

Big John:Sent: 03:35 PM 08/29/2009:
Oh, so no piggybacks then? Fine. In a week. I will try to wear you out. Sorry, talking to the pants again.

Big John:Sent: 03:36 PM 08/29/2009:
After i cum you better not mind me snoring.

Big John:Sent: 03:37 PM 08/29/2009:
Do you ever hook up with other guys or girls?

Big John:Sent: 03:41 PM 08/29/2009:
You didnt answer the question.

Big John:Sent: 03:43 PM 08/29/2009:
Ok. I would like to have a threesome with you and another girl you trust. Does a 20 piece bucket divide by three?

Big John:Sent: 03:48 PM 08/29/2009:
Does that excite you at all or no? I got a chub and it’s makin my sweat pants fit funny.

Big John:Sent: 03:52 PM 08/29/2009:
God girl. You better want to take care of me. I paid for your trailer and the abortions.

Big John:Sent: 03:56 PM 08/29/2009:
You do. Need more of it.

Big John:Sent: 03:59 PM 08/29/2009:
of gravy. What were you thinking?

Big John:Sent: 04″02 PM 08/29/2009:
I want to treat you rough. Throw you around, smack and slap you.

Big John:Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:
Sorry, talking to my own dick.

Slap on a slice. Treat you like a tasty little sandwich. Put my cheese on your meat and then shove it down my throat

Big John:Sent: 04:07 PM 08/29/2009:
You are the best fucking sandwich I ever had.

Big John:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Put you down while i choke. Stop eating so fast. Then finish that hoagie that i own

Big John:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:
Then im going to tell you to shut the Fuck up while i slap on more cheese. Want to pull my finger? It’ll make a noise.

Big John:Sent: 04:21 PM 08/29/2009:
Where do you want to be bitten?

Big John:Sent: 04:24 PM 08/29/2009:
Ok. Now I’m talking to the sandwich again. Whatever i want? Ham. Lots of ham.

Big John:Sent: 04:39 PM 08/29/2009:
Whatever else turns you on

Big John:Sent: 04:43 PM 08/29/2009:
You tell me what you like.

Big John:Sent: 04:48 PM 08/29/2009:
Yeah, I love those, but only if you can get them in peanut butter. Delicious. Always will be. Don’t trust people. Animal love — it’s the purest form of love.

Big John:Sent: 04:48 PM 08/29/2009:
But you still have not told me what turns you on

Big John:Sent: 04:53 PM 08/29/2009:
Sorry, talking to lawnmower. I know you have tried everything imaginable but what turns you on besides a dp

Big John:Sent: 5:00 PM 08/29/2009:
Double pork. Like bacon and ham. I really do want to be rough with you. Slap you around

Big John:Sent: 05:12 PM 08/29/2009:
Shit, I’m drunk. Fighting will breach my probation.

Big John:Sent: 05:15 PM 08/29/2009:
I want you to beg for my cock. Give me a six pack of beer to convince me to let you have it in your mouth

Big John:Sent: 05:18 PM 08/29/2009:
Oh, and a Filet o Fish. A Filet o Fish, a twenty pack of nuggets and six beers. We will see how bad you want me

Big John:Sent: 05:26 PM 08/29/2009:
Next time i see you, you better beg and if you don’t do it right i will eat, drink, fuck and sleep. In that order. Might take a shit in there too.

Big John:Sent: 09:20 AM 09/03/2009:
That was me playing sexy. Sorry.

Big John:Sent: 04:17 AM 09/04/2009:
Maybe you can fly out to chicage on monday night and leave early wed

Big John:Sent: 04:23 AM 09/04/2009:
I land at 930 or 10 monday night. You could pick me up a few of those deep dish pizzas chicago style.

Big John:Sent: 11:57 AM 09/04/2009:
Great. Make it three. Biggie Size them. What time so you land

Big John:Sent: 12:06 PM 09/04/2009:
I land at the earliest at 8 and the latest will be 10

Big John:Sent: 12:08 PM 09/04/2009:
Midway. Great WWII battle. Sorry, what were we talking about?

Big John:Sent: 01:42 AM 09/07/2009:
I cant wait to see you as well. What time do you land again. Remember, dipping sauce.

Big John:Sent: 03:15 AM 09/07/2009:
You are going to be headed to the hyatt lodge. 2815 jorie blvd oak brook, il 60523. Phone 630 990 5800. Next to Chilis.

Big John:Sent: 11:38 AM 09/07/2009:
Did you get my text with all the info. Chilis. To go. The little burgers. 30 of them.

Big John:Sent: 11:41 AM 09/07/2009:
I will text you the room number when i get there. Im still in boston

Big John:Sent: 11:43 AM 09/07/2009:
Oh it’s not Boston. Its Boston Market. Hey, carved meats! Oh, btw, I have to check in to get the room

Big John:Sent: 11:44 AM 09/07/2009:
I should get there before you anyways

Big John:Sent: 12:27 PM 09/07/2009:
In about 3 hours

Big John:Sent: 12:30 PM 09/07/2009:
I will be drunk before you for sure

Big John:Sent: 12:35 PM 09/07/2009:
You just make sure you take care of me when you get here. If I shit myself or pass out or something, wake me up.

Big John:Sent: 06:28 PM 09/07/2009:
Great. Just woke up. I shit myself.

Big John:Sent: 06:30 PM 09/07/2009:
Let me know when your about 20 out i will order dinner. And what would you like to eat

Big John:Sent: 06:33 PM 09/07/2009:
I am pretty tired after today. I slept in a dumpster outside a bar last night. Not much sleep. I am going to go to sleep early

Big John:Sent: 06:53 PM 09/07/2009:
How close are you

Big John:Sent: 07:09 PM 09/07/2009:
What do you want to eat. I ate all your food already.

Big John:Sent: 07:10 PM 09/07/2009:
Anything simple. That’s how I like my women.

Big John:Sent: 07:12 PM 09/07/2009:
No turkey unless it’s a club sandwich.

Big John:Sent: 07:32 PM 09/07/2009:
How close? Well, it’s like a chicken only bigger. What do you eat on thanksgiving?

Big John:Sent: 07:38 PM 09/07/2009:
Head to the elevators and go to 334. Thats your room. The door will be open with the dead bolt. I have to get back here to wait for the food. Im in room 358.

Big John:Sent: 07:42 PM 09/07/2009:
Let me know when you are in the room. Food just got here

Big John:Sent: 07:47 PM 09/07/2009:
I ate all your food. Sorry. Dessert was sweet. Dont come down here yet. Sauce everywhere. Lots of farts in the air. I will let you know when it clears

Big John:Sent: 08:16 PM 09/07/2009:
Are you close to being ready

Big John:Sent; 08:32 PM 09/07/2009:
Sorry, talking to my microwave burrito. Come on down. Its quiet here now. Took a shit. Stopped farting.

Big John:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009:
There is a room service cart in my hall. Be careful — I think I shit on it.

Big John:Sent: 08:35 PM 09/07/2009:

Big John:Sent: 09:59 PM 09/07/2009:
Make it, ok? it’s just one sandwich.

Big John:Sent: 10:01 PM 09/07/2009:
Ok. Lights out. Good night sexy

Big John:Sent: 08:49 AM 09/08/2009:
Hope you slept as good as i did. I just woke up in a dry, crumbfree bed which is un heard of

Big John:Sent: 10:23 AM 09/08/2009:
Shit, I am in a different room. Where am I? Who is this woman. When can i have a bed like this again

Big John:Sent: 12:40 PM 09/08/2009:
I will be back in a couple hours. i don’t think i’m even in Chicago anymore.

Big John:Sent: 12:42 PM 09/08/2009:
I have to leave for an appearance at 430 but i will be back at 730 for dinner and lots of dessert. How about a quickie before i go:) Drive thru’s around the corner.

Big John:Sent: 01:28 PM 09/08/2009:
Yeah, Biggie Size it. BTW – Have you ever had a golden shower done to you

Big John:Sent: 01:29 PM 09/08/2009:
Just morbid curiosity. I passed out in a urinal once. Didn’t like it.

Big John:Sent: 01:30 PM 09/08/2009:
Really. You. You have done just about everything havent you

Big John:Sent: 01:32 PM 09/08/2009:
Never done it. Didn’t even think you could deep fry that. Wouldn’t it just melt? I think i would get stage freight

Big John:Sent: 02:28 PM 09/08/2009:
Maybe. But only with powdered sugar.

Big John:Sent: 03:38 PM 09/08/2009:
I will be over in 10mins

Big John:Sent: 03:40 PM 09/08/2009:
Aw fuck, I’m too drunk to walk. Why dont you come over here now instead

Big John:Sent: 03:41 PM 09/08/2009:
Enter thru room 360. Its next door

Big John:Sent: 03:42 PM 09/08/2009:
Hurry so i come in that ass

Big John:Sent: 03:54 PM 09/08/2009:
No, there was seriously a donkey in my room. I came on it. Don’t know why. Drunk. Just let me know when you leave your room

Big John:Sent: 07:32 PM 09/08/2009:
You felt amazing to baby. How much trouble was it to get rid of that donkey?

Big John:Sent: 07:35 PM 09/08/2009:
Having a few issues at home. Might be a little later before i see you tonight

Big John:Sent: 07:39 PM 09/08/2009:
Entire house melt down:( Should have put out that bonfire in my living room.

Big John:Sent: 08:01 PM 09/08/2009:
How much was your flight. Southwest’s usually got good deals.

Big John:Sent: 05:03 AM 09/09/2009:
Shit i fell back to sleep. just woke up. Where are my pants? My dick’s caught in a beer can. I have to leave in about 15 mins. I tee off at 700

Big John:Sent: 07:43 PM 09/09/2009:
Great thing is we have a life time of this. But I’ll be dead by the time I am 50

Big John:Sent: 05:44 AM 10/01/2009:
I know that. Thats why i wont do that. Never. I just know. It tastes like its “Diet”. It just does.

Big John:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:
Baby im not going anywhere or doing anything. Too hungover. You please me like no other has or ever will. I’m not losing that. You have to understand people love to tal

Big John:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:
k about me. sometimes its good and sometimes its bad. Like pizza. You have any pizza? I have learned to just roll with it. My life is a

Big John:Sent: 06:02 PM 10/01/2009:
fish bowl. Just drank from a fish bowl. Jesus, I am hungover.

Big John:Sent: 10:40 AM 10/04/2009:
Guys from the bar. So my agent being suggested that we go back to my room for lunch. He doesnt know about us, obviously

Big John:Sent: 11:31 AM 10/04/2009:
This has been a total shit trip. Im sorry i fucked up last night. I shit everywhere. We will get it right next time so we can both use the toilet.

Big John:Sent: 12:06 PM 10/04/2009:
Oh my god. If they were with me, that’s three more people and no toilet. I would have ruined everything

Big John:Sent: 12:07 PM 10/04/2009:
I told you. Oh my god. I cant believe what just happened. They forgot to Biggie Size my order.

Big John:Sent: 12:08 PM 10/04/2009:
Don’t Fucking talk to me. You almost just ruined my whole life. If you don’t check the bag, you don’t know whether they got the order right, Fuck


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